WORK
Authority
When we are children there are authority figures all around –
parents, teachers, all other adults and even older children.
If we have had good relationships with those early authority figures
then it is usually easy to deal with authority in adult life. We can
both respond to authority in others and use the authority of our
position well.
But it is not uncommon to find in a particular case that there can
be issues that are hard to understand or deal with from within the
situation. Here is a boss who is a bit of a bully. There is a boss who
is a nun who demands enormous amounts from herself and therefore from
you also. How can one deal with such situations? Who can advise?
Although I cannot promise to find a way to resolve all such
problems, I have found that in most cases discussed with me there are
some ways of improving matters that do work. At times dramatically, at
other times tolerably.
One little side effect of just talking things over with a
sympathetic outsider is that it gets rid of some of the resentment
that can be bottled up. That makes you able to behave in a more
composed way at the next meeting. The boss is likely to respond better
to that attitude (suppressed resentment looks unpleasant as well as
feeling bad). That in turn enables you to feel more confident. Just
those improvements can help the two of you to turn the corner. The
other side of the coin can often also be important. What do we do if
we are given a post in which we need to be able to exert authority and
have no taste or experience of it? Again there are ways to improve,
and a little personalised guidance can go a long way.
